6 min read

Anthony's MCU Binge: An Introduction!

I thought I'd be doing this in silence, but the muse...it demands I chronicle this cinematic super-journey. With blurbs! And movie ratings!
Anthony's MCU Binge: An Introduction!
A photo collage of characters from movies and TV shows for audiences of ALL ages. NOT. JUST. KIDS. DON'T LOOK AT ME AT LIKE THAT!!!

The Marvel Cinematic Universe! Is there anything in film we need to hear less about? Hollywood’s capitalist goal of marketing to the largest, usually global, market possible, focusing on established intellectual property, exploiting talent and circumventing artistry predates my existence on Earth, and probably yours (unless you remember when Dr. No came out). Nonetheless, the MCU added a sub-basement to the industry's race to the creative bottom by creating the “megafranchise": a theatrical brand the audience would follow through endless character team-ups and spin-offs, on the big screen and the small, potentially for decades. By comparison, James Bond is just a dude with a gun, visiting every few years like a rich uncle.

But is this a "race to the creative bottom” at all? Adapting the byzantine world of superhero comic crossovers to the big screen and selling it to the four-quadrant PG-13 blockbuster market is an unprecedented accomplishment, requiring patience, a diversity in content and a consistency in craft. Producer Kevin Feige combined genuine affection and respect for the material with an understanding of what was needed to broaden attendance: charismatic actors, directors both inspired and amenable to studio notes, and a sense of what makes each character unique and engaging, both visually and conceptually. As proven by fiascos like Universal’s Dark Universe and Warner/DC’s Snyderverse, this is not an easy thing for entertainment execs to pull off. If the lack of a proper foundation doesn’t sink you, egos, poor management and a lack of taste will. And was the era when genre sequels were churned out indifferently as long as the budget/profit ratio made marginal sense any better?

We Didn't Start The Fire...

Either way, the MCU is now fifteen years old, either past its prime or in the middle of a post-climactic slump after the Infinity Gauntlet hoo-ha. While the films continue to grab eyes and bring in the bucks, Feige himself has admitted production needs to slow down and tune up to re-establish novelty and make sure audiences are on board for the next arc. But even if they fail, the MCU will remain the gold standard of blockbuster filmmaking from a commercial context, in terms of scope and endurance.

I had to say “commercial context" lest fans of cinematic art come at me with pitchforks. While I’ll take the Pepsi challenge and put these films up against any other class of content rated PG-13, I’ll admit they’ve been brutal, bad news for auteurists. If you love Hollywood for the romance of a director taking a big artistic swing, preferring ambitious folly and transcendent triumph to mere accomplished entertainment, the MCU signifies a return to pre-‘60s studio filmmaking, only worse. At least those directors got to write original stories and adapt novels. At least actors got to establish their own identity instead of assign their charm to a decades-old comic book costume.

While cognizant of these artistic concerns and what it all may portend for the industry, I love this crap. Before I ever bought a comic book with a story, I was dropping DC’s character guide Who’s Who into my mom’s grocery cart. Learning the history, biographies and powers gave me the inspiration to scribble out my own stories. It was truly more bang for my, or rather, my mom’s, buck. That Feige and company figured out what was necessary to build a cinematic world without quickly capsizing has been a delight. I love the mix of ensemble comedy and heroic derring-do, the smarts shown on adapting the stories to the medium’s strengths. The refusal to be bound to mere recreation of established comic storylines (as if these characters haven’t been twisted every which way over the decades anyway).

Only a dollar?! What a time to be alive. And a complete dweeb.

I paid less attention after my kid was born and Avengers: Endgame gave us weary, older attendees an easy place to drop out. I've seen none of the movies since and only Loki and Moon Knight of the shows. Then earlier this year, I decided to aim high with my TV time and finally get The Criterion Channel. After I attempt to watch every movie and every television show connected to the MCU in order of release. Well, at least the start of every TV season. Maybe four episodes? I mean, The Inhumans? The Hulu stuff? We'll see. I’d have to get there first anyway. My MCU master list has a total of 80 movies, shorts & TV seasons meant to be online by the end of 2023. Woof.

At first I didn’t plan to write about this nonsense at all. My goal was simply personal entertainment and sating curiosity. There are plenty of listicles about the best and the worst of these films, and my takes aren’t that novel. But as I ventured into the fray, I desired to share my surprise at how good Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. turned out to be. Then I wanted to give it up for the Defenders shows, originally on Netflix and highly recommended to people who genuinely mourn the lack of adult themes and sexuality in the films (though do Film Twitter types notice they sound cranky they weren't aroused during Doctor Strange when they make these gripes?). Realizing how many takes I was typing into my insta-stories, I accepted I obviously had something to share. So buckle into the Quinjet! Cuz we're off to Take-anda!

While I’ll probably write an essay here and there about the shows, I decided capsules would work better for the movies, keeping me from blathering too long about these  popular products either seen or avoided by everybody for years. I’m also taking the opportunity to update my ratings scale for old-ass movies on streaming (I don't rate new movies, because of my principles and love for the Pauline Kael-esque thinkpiece where the author suddenly gives spoilers). I’m still paying ironically self-serious tribute to On Cinema, but shifting from a Tim perspective to a Gregg one.

If I’ve seen a movie more than once, and can imagine watching it many times after, that, dear reader, is…a POPCORN CLASSIC. It’s a vibe. It’s an old friend. It’s got a certain je ne sais quoi, a certain somethin’ somethin’, that will regularly fit my mood when scrolling through the options at 11pm, when I should be going to bed but won’t.

Sometimes a movie is truly wonderful, a great night at the cinema, but doesn’t demand repeat viewings. Maybe it’s too depressing. Maybe it's a touch too long. Or maybe it’s my first time seeing it and I can’t honestly swear it passes muster as a Popcorn Classic. These films earn FIVE BAGS OF POPCORN. Still mandatory viewing for any Hollywood cineaste. Just maybe start it before 10pm.

If a movie gets FOUR BAGS, you should probably still see it so your cinema-loving friends don’t think you’re wack, but I must remove one bag out of protest. Nobody should get fired for making this movie, but maybe someone should get a talking to.

THREE BAGS means I watched the whole thing, so I can’t really ask for a refund. But the movie should only be watched for completist purposes or because you’ve already watched all the good movies. They really screwed up this time.

If I don’t finish a movie, or fast forward to where Wikipedia says something interesting happens, I don’t write a review. That wouldn’t be fair to the filmmakers or the reader. Besides, in the online world, silence is the most lethal pan of all.

I'll be plopping my takes on MCU: Phase One soon, but I wanted to give everybody time to get psyched or look away. Excelsior!