Mimi Parker, 1967-2022

I woke up Sunday morning to the news that Mimi Parker of Low had passed away. She was 55, a little younger than my own mother was when she died (also from cancer), leaving behind two children a little younger than my sister and I had been. Both women lived long enough to build an impressive body of work, and raise two kids the best they could. Both were with family who loved them when they passed, and hopefully found pride and comfort in that. But they didn’t get to see those kids grow and become mature adults themselves, possibly gaining a more empathetic understanding and appreciation for all the sacrifices and support their mothers made & gave. These women didn’t get to sit back, relax and enjoy all they had accomplished.

My one bit of faith about death is that, whether there’s a big bouncy castle in the sky or just eternal sleep, the dead are at peace. They’re okay. It’s those left behind who mourn what might have been, missing the emotional companionship and connection. Those who loved and knew Mimi Parker aren’t going to get to see her enjoy a warm, cozy retirement after all her years of hard work and creation. When my mom passed, my initial feelings were ones of gratitude for all the guidance and wisdom she’d shared, and relief that the pain of living with cancer was over. A comprehension of the loss was more gradual. As my own life evolved and was affected by new experiences - marriage, chronic illness, parenthood, divorce - I realized they would have added new dimensions to our understanding of each other. She would have been inspired to recall anecdotes I’d never heard before, share surprising observations and enjoy becoming a grandmother. While losing a parent or any loved one is never easy, it breaks my heart to know that Parker’s children will have to feel a pain similar to my own, and that another amazing, unique woman has left us too soon. (Fittingly enough, Low's "Mother" - sung by Mimi's husband and life-long collaborator Alan Sparhawk - beautifully captures an adult child's gratitude and grief).

I’ve written plenty about Low on this iteration of my blog. How I Like Low: The Playlist was one of the first posts I published, and Alan bothering to share it on the band’s official Twitter account was a big ego boost for me (not that he’s picky about the RTs, but still, it was less of a given than “jamming the new album! Wooo!”). I also made a post about Low's videos and called HEY WHAT my favorite album of 2021. I truly believe Low got better with every decade, a compliment I don’t think I can give any other band or musical artist in the history of rock. I Could Live In Hope through Trust was great, but The Great Destroyer through The Invisible Way was even better. And their last three albums, Ones And Sixes, Double Negative and HEY WHAT are a stunning and sonically startling chronicle of personal, political and cultural pain and endurance.

Low conveyed unsparing honesty and unflinching love and faith in the face of whatever life threw at them and us alike, while challenging themselves to find new sounds and new ways to express that love and faith. Their It’s Friday I’m In Low Instagram streams were a tremendous source of solace during that first year of lockdown, featuring minimalist versions of their entire songbook, warm harmonies and oodles of Minnesota nice (including many trips to Alan’s garden). When Mimi stopped appearing in every episode, I assumed she might have been taking care of a loved one with COVID. It never occurred to me she might be dealing with her own health challenges until she announced them on a solo podcast appearance earlier this year. Her experience with ovarian cancer seemed to be in the rear view, but near the end of summer a reoccurrence was announced and shows were canceled (I was touched to see Beak> was as bummed about them not being at Primavera in LA as I was). Low did get to do one more set at the Water Is Life Festival this September in their hometown of Duluth. I hope it was even a sliver as rewarding for them as their music was for us.

Though I’ve posted plenty of YouTubes of Low in previous posts, I never made a video playlist. The one below is for my benefit as much as anyone else’s, embellishing the Spotify playlist posted last year with two clips from HEY WHAT and some goodies from the videos post. There's more from the later albums than the earlier (I said they got better!), but only Secret Name got the shaft entirely. Lots of official videos but also some live clips, nonchronological to better appreciate the totality of their sound and exploit the pacing of their actual albums (I love to open with openers and close with closers when it flows!). Consider "In Metal" the closer, and "Let's Stay Together" the encore. If we didn't know love we wouldn't have anything to mourn.

If someone asked me to name my favorite band, I might balk at the idea of one band or artist capturing the breadth of my musical appreciation. And is it about the highest highs? The most consistent discography? Emotional range? It’s also possible I might just say Low. There’s lots of bands I can party with, relate to, or awe at. But, as every kind of youth becomes harder to claim for myself, Low is who’ve gone to when I need solace and perspective and catharsis and noise. When I need a reminder that we’re not in it alone. A reminder that there’s beauty in everything, and that endurance doesn’t require denial, just faith. Right now I can spin the playlist below and appreciate all that Mimi, Alan, their bassists and producers, have given us. I can be glad that so many other fans and peers (you should read Drew Daniel of Matmos' reflection) are taking the time to celebrate just how outstanding Low were and pay their respects. Truly grasping that we’re not getting more from Mimi will come later.

‌‌Low: 1994-2022

1. "Words" (I Could Live In Hope, 1994)
2. "Monkey" (The Great Destroyer, 2005)
3. "No Comprende" (Ones And Sixes, 2015)
4. "Canada" (Trust, 2002)
5. "Shame" (Long Division, 1995)
6. "Fly" (Double Negative, 2018)
7. "Breaker" (Drums And Guns, 2007)
8. "Over The Ocean" (The Curtain Hits The Cast, 1996)
9. "Holy Ghost" (The Invisible Way, 2013)
10. "Hey" (HEY WHAT, 2021)
11. "Especially Me" (C’mon, 2011)
12. "In The Drugs" (Trust, 2002)
13. "Just Make It Stop" (The Invisible Way, 2013)
14. "More" (HEY WHAT, 2020)
15. "Lies" (Ones And Sixes, 2015)
16. "Disarray" (Double Negative, 2018)
17. "Murderer" (Drums And Guns, 2007)
18. "Death Of A Salesman" (The Great Destroyer, 2005)
19. "In Metal" (Things We Lost In The Fire, 2001)
20. "Let’s Stay Together" (Single, 2018)